Some of you (thousands of readers!) may remember back when I wrote a few articles trying to inform the public about the Church of Scientology-
well I received some angry messages claiming that I was bashing a religion out of ignorance and now I'm afraid that someone is going to proclaim me a 'suppressive person' (an "antisocial" whose behaviour is "disastrous") and destroy me. Lucky that my bank balance is at $-5, so they can't get me there!
Anyways, I've thought a lot about what exactly terrifies me about this new movement of some (supposed) million people. At first I thought it was the use of non-professional psychological methods as 'religious ritual.' But I wouldn't want to claim that (potential) alternative healing methods (whether accepted by the APA or not) should never be considered a spiritual exercise. Mind you, no one should be misled into paying thousands of dollars for these methods.
No- It's the fact that they're not even TRYING to hide!
TOP 3 WAYS TO DISGUISE YOUR CULT
1. Try not to be responsible for mysterious and avoidable deaths.
2. Maybe don't market your 'religious' services at the carnival-
it will only make me associate your cult with the absurd EVEN MORE.
(I had some dianetics done on me last summer right after the tilt-a-whirl when I was hangin with my homegirls at the Toronto Exhibition. This guy who looked like a robot fiddled around with his alarm clock and told me I was completely stressed out and I needed to purchase Hubbard's book on dianetics. But I was clearly having a blast. FAIL for dianetics.
3. You probably should not sue into bankruptcy and then monopolize the only active cult watch group in the country. It makes you look creepy.
...MORE TIPS TO COME
carny scientologist freaks are my favourite, especially when they are making me edgy by trying to convert my gf (you).
ReplyDeleteps lolcat to the max. this is my fav blog on the net.